INT/EXT: collaboration with Ellie Green

‘Sometimes I walk through crowds
    and pull down my hood as far as it can go’


                                                                     ‘Last night I dreamt that I was telling everyone a story                                                                               but no one was listening - no one let me say the                                                                                                                                                     punchline’
                               

‘I try and do things that will make me melt a little,
 give me nice quiet feelings.
Those morning moments - sunlight - coffee - just you awake’

                                                                                                                                 ‘Soaked with sweat                                                             I danced up close to everyone - as close as I could - I did - 
                                                          I needed it - but I left hungry - the true thing wasn’t there’


‘I sat on the bath’s edge -
it all felt so deliciously helpless my wet face my wet arse
the cold bathroom. There was something so beautiful in giving up’


                                                                                               ‘The sickening crunching and tightening                                                 that happens when you neglect yourself - travel far from yourself -                                 travel far away into other people’s bodies. I’ve been on holiday for too long’


‘I need to strip everything away -
lose my layers -
turn away from the sun -
so I can build myself again’

                                                               ‘What scares me most is living a dull life, one of seclusion,                                        one where I choose to be upstairs creating a cocoon to prevent any love                                                                              from penetrating me, leaving me naked, unarmed’


‘I fear the path where I lose myself,
become heady and withdrawn from routine,
choosing powder and the dwindling promise of adventure
that gets old and lost over time’


                                                                                                                  ‘I seek the world, I embrace it’
‘I seek myself, I embrace my knees...
                             ...I bend my knees’                                    
                                                                                                                                      ‘I open the door’

        ‘I bend my head’                                   

                                                                                                                                 ‘I call out -’

                ‘I look inside’                                        
                                                                                                        ‘I look outside’
                       
                       
                                                                          
                                                                           I see me




In this project, we wanted to explore the idea of 'self portrait'- representing personality through an image - subjectivity in art. Because of the collaborative element, Ellie painted the image from a face-morph of us both. We also find it interesting that we're the same personality types, but I'm the extrovert type, and Ellie's the introvert, which connects to this whole idea of inner and outer worlds, two opposing concepts which we have attempted to blend together. The words to go with it is a dialogue between the introverted and extroverted self which then become one.